Highlights from the
section
POPULAR & FOLK
TUNES
If
I Had a Hammer
Scarborough
Fair
Here
Comes the Rain Again
Moon
River
Fun,
Fun, Fun
Speak
Softly, Love (Godfather theme)
What a Wonderful World!
The protests brought up the question of protest songs
that related to the President.
SINCE I HAVE MY
TWITTER
Tune of “If I
Had a Hammer”
Since I have my twitter
I
twitter every morning
I
twitter every evening
To
get the word through
I
twitter at pundits
I
twitter at freedoms
I
twitter of love for all the voters in the red states
And
also the blue (ooh, ooh)
Since I have a tower
I
tower over bloggers
I
tower over papers
The
protestors, too
I
tower over pundits
I
tower over freedom
I
tower over love for all the voters in the red states
And
then think about you (ooh, ooh, ooh)
If I had a hammer
I’d
hammer all the bloggers
I’d
hammer all the papers
The
protestors too
I’d
hammer at pundits
I’d
hammer at freedoms
I’d
hammer out love for all the voters in the red states
And
some of the blue (ooh, ooh, ooh)
Now I have that hammer
And
I have a tower
And
I’ve got a tweet to tweet
To
get my word through
It’s
the hammer of SCOTUS
It’s
the tower I built from scratch
It’s
a tweet about love for all
The
voters in the red states
And
also for you, ooh, ooh
On the tweeting about Mika and Morning Joe.
tune of SCARBOROUGH FAIR
Was
the knocking at Scarborough fair
Tweets
insane and scary at times
Remember,
Mika, that we all care
Soon
you’ll see, your influence climbs
Tell
folks the country is starting to hurt
Tweets
so strange and scary at times
We
don’t need a kid who rolls in dirt
That
can’t be a true Prez of mine.
Are
the knocks on Scarborough fair
Tweets
insane and scary at times
Remember,
Mika, know that we care
Soon
we’ll see, your influence climbs
Seems
they’re going for Scarborough’s fare
His
and Mika’s ratings have climbed
They’re
climbing up to a bigger share
Then
they’ll be like true paradigms
Bracing for Trump’s plane coming back to New York when
it brings him to Trump Tower for a visit.
HERE COMES HIS PLANE AGAIN
Tune of “Here Comes the Rain Again”
Here
comes his plane again
Flying overhead bringing
misery
Bringing traffic jams to
the heart of Midtown
I
want to walk on Fifth Avenue
I want to window shop at
Gucci
I want to cab home to
the East Side
Is that okay with you
Stay out of N-Y-C - like
others do
Yes, out of N-Y-C - like
others do
Here’s
his plane again
Feel the strain again
Cars won’t move again
When the Trumps finally moved to DC, the traffic in
Midtown finally eased up.
Tiffany’s did all it could to get customers back.
TRUMP TOWER
Tune of “Moon
River” (Breakfast at Tiffany’s theme)
Trump Tower
Peaceful
for a while
So
come and shop in style today
That deal-maker
That
press-shaker
Whenever
he’s going
We’re
going “Okay!”
You shoppers
Walk
into our store
Just
walk right through our door, we’re here
Not just one-percenters, my friend
More
than just high end
So
come inside and spend
Trump
Tower’s all clear
In the Times: “Visit the Donald J. Trump
Presidential Twitter Library…”
This brings to mind one of our all-time favorite
library-related songs!
FUN,
FUN, FUN
TIL
MELANIA TAKES HIS I-PHONE AWAY
Tune of “Fun,
Fun, Fun”
Well, he’s Commander in Chief
That’s a thing that he may not understand now
So
he’ll need a real good library
Which he’ll build on a nice plot of land now
But
since his output was great
He’ll get one sooner that he really had planned
now
Cause
he’ll have fun, fun, fun
Til
Melania takes his I-phone away
Everybody seems to know
That
his tweets are not the least Presidential
But
the late night writers
Know
that following him is really essential
And
they follow them closely
Cause
they have lots of great comic potential
They’ll
all have fun, fun, fun
Til
Melania takes his I-phone away
A parody lyric inspired by the great writer Maureen
Dowd’s comparison of the (possibly taped?) classic Donald Trump-Jim Comey
dinner to a classic film.
SPEAK CLEARLY, JIM
Tune of “Speak Softly, Love (Godfather theme)”
Speak
clearly, Jim,
And
give The Don a kiss and hug
There’s
no one here,
Just
you and me, there is no bug
So
let’s talk free,
My,
you’re so slim
But
what I really mean is please speak clearly, Jim
Let’s
not talk work, at least we’ll try
Cause
dangers lurk, and we might lie
Speak
clearly, Jim
This
is a social little meal
Here,
have a drink
And
say exactly what you feel
Please
spill your guts,
And
on a whim
Just
say I’m not a target,
And
–
Speak
clearly, Jim!
The most
conservative Republicans ruminate over the issues of the day.
WHAT A ONE-PERCENT WORLD!
Tune of “What A Wonderful World"
We see loads of green,
real estate too.
Hope this ain’t mean -
for us, not you
And we smile to
ourselves: What a one-percent world!
We see fabulous seats,
for smash hit shows
We see great eats,
wine flows and flows
So we smile to
ourselves: What a one-percent world!
The scattered plan for
health care, does not bother us
The people with no
wealth care, we don’t make a fuss
If we don’t get our
tax cut, watch us raise a stink
But are we happy? What do you think?
We hear people gripe
about the Prez
Let them all snipe at
what he says
And we think to
ourselves! What a one-percent
world.
Yes, we think of
ourselves
What a wonderful,
one-percent world.
Highlights from the
section
TV TUNES
The
Patty Duke Show theme song
Addams
Family theme song
Flipper
theme song
A look back at that debate where, from question to question, you
never knew what mood the future President would be in!
(with
thanks to Jan Horvath)
BUT THEY’RE DONALDS,
IDENTICAL DONALDS!
Tune of “The Patty Dike Show” theme
Here’s
Donald who smiled at five past nine
His tone
direct, all set to shine
Then Donald
at nine-thirty-five
We weren’t
sure if he'd arrive.
Watch him
kvetch and whine!
But they’re
Donalds!
Identical
Donalds on that stage.
One acts
real Presidential,
One acts
insane with rage.
That Donald
enjoys a chat that’s brisk
Can speak
with poise of stop-and-frisk
The other is
a malcontent
He surely
can't be President
It’s not
worth the risk!
But they’re
Donalds!
Identical
Donalds start to end
They look
alike, they dress alike
But they
could not be less alike.
They can
never blend.
But both
Donalds - are ready to trend!
Thinking about what Gomez Addams could
help us understand about the Trump tax returns. (inspired by an analysis in the Times)
THE DONALD’S FAMILY
Tune of “The
Addams Family” theme
Ba-da-da-dum
(click, click),
Ba-da-da-dum
(click, click)
Ba-da-da-dum,
ba-da-da-dum,
Ba-da-da-dum
(click, click)
The losses are surprising
Deductions
tantalizing
Who
did the dumb advising –
For
Donald’s Family
We do not mean to pester
Was
Lurch a key investor
The
deals seem made by Fester –
For
Donald’s Family
Tweet!
Cheat?
Elite!
The country now is buzzin’
Transgressions
by the dozen
So
should they call the fuzz in –
On
Donald’s Family
So all across the nation
There’s
hopeful speculation
The
bus has left the station –
For
Donald’s Family
From the point of view of people who like the
President’s tweeting but would rather he be consistent:
(lyric
with thanks to Jan Horvath)
WE CALL HIM FLIPPER!
Tune of “Flipper” theme
song
Everyone
knows the word from the Prez
Is
subject to change, whatever he says.
So
we await each tweet that he sends
The
flip-flopping fun never ends!
We
call him Flipper!
Flipper!
Fast
and confusing,
With
any text
Reversed
by the next.
And
we know Flipper
Lives
in a world of sensation
And
make the nation truly perplexed!
