Saturday, July 1, 2017

SOME SHOW TUNES & AMERICAN SONGBOOK TUNES

Highlights from the section
SHOW TUNES &
AMERICAN SONGBOOK TUNES

I’m Still Here
Only Make Believe I Love You
Hey Big Spender
Brush Up Your Shakespeare
Que Sera Sera


Trump visits NYC, causing a fortune in security costs and a lot of inconvenience.

TRUMP IS HERE
Tune of “I’m Still Here”

Tempers all flaring,
Wishing the traffic were clear
While he’s here
Car horns all blaring,
Somebody big must be near
Yes, he’s here
Soon he’ll be tweeting, watch him sell
How his big meeting went so well
Then it’s a ride to the Pier
Yes he’s here

Philly, Chicago,
Anywhere else would be sweet
But he’s here
Posh Mar-A-Lago,
Ain’t that his normal retreat?

No, he’s here
He’s making headlines in D.C.
Facing some deadlines, golly gee
He’s trusting health care to his V.P. with no fear
Wheels there are getting in gear
And he’s here

(big finish)
Rumors are swirling,
What’s the next place he will be
Now he’s here
Harrisburg, Sterling,
Maybe Bethesda M-D
But he’s here

On the Intrepid,
In his Tower
Mood may be tepid,
At this hour
But soon they’ll cheer or they’ll jeer
Near the Pier
Lord knows he won’t see the Mayor
While he’s here
‘Cause he’s here
Donald’s here


Trump calls former FBI Director Jim Comey a “showboat.”  Overheard as background music for the Trump-Comey dinner:

COMEY, MAKE BELIEVE I TRUST YOU
Tune of “Only Make Believe I Love You”
from SHOWBOAT

Comey, make believe I trust you
Comey, make believe that you trust me
Others grump: Donald Trump is colluding,
But could you
And your crew
Disagree?

Make believe and stop intruding
Make believe you pledged your loyalty.
You trust me, and believe I’ll trust you
Or to tell the truth, you’re through



Mashing up the Donald Trump exaggeration stories with “Sweet Charity” being on the must-see shows list as he was taking office:

HEY, BIG TALKER
Tune of “Hey, Big Spender”

The minute we walked in the place
We could see you were a man of distortions
A real big talker
Inventive, falsified
Some call it hyperbolic
But some say that you lied

So let us cut right to the chase
Why misrepresent
What everyone can see
Hey big talker
Talk a bit more honestly

 “How’d you like to have funds?
(Funds, funds)
Cut your health costs in half
(Half, half)
Spread the wealth around – big time!”

(dance break, then)

So let us say right to your face
We can count
And so can any child of three
Hey big talker
Hey big talker
Talk a bit more honestly


On the proliferation of shows across America working Trump in, both critically and respectfully, depending on where.

TRUMP UP YOUR SCHEDULE
Tune of “Brush Up Your Shakespeare”

These days when you depict royalty
You hope the crowds will pledge loyalty
And so you try to be here-and-now
And hope the right will not have a cow.
So to heighten the appeal
There’s a trend that’s really pleasin’
The subscribers close the deal
When Donald is in your season!

Trump up your schedule
Put Trump on your stage
Trump up your schedule
And you’re sure to be the rage
                                                              
When your Sweeney sings out his Epiphany
Make the props even more Kathy Griffin-y.
When Eliza and Higgins start bickering
Why not offer Mike Flynn as their Pickering?
To make crowds feel more comfy and homey
Have Trump sing “Let it Go” to Jim Comey.

Trump up your schedule
Put the Prez on stage
And they’ll all engage!



And in closing, a salute to  the Therapy dogs people used to cope with the election results.

HEY, SO WHAT, SO WHAT?
Tune of “Que Sera Sera”

When we elected Donald Trump
I asked my doggie what lies ahead
Should we try moving, should we stay put
Here’s what my doggie said

Hey so what, so what
There’s no need to be distraught
Now let’s see the food you bought
Hey so what, so what
Yes, let’s eat, let’s eat

When we were watching all those Trumps
As they were talking on CBS
I asked my dog if he had advice
He calmly nodded yes

Hey so what, so what?
What they said to Lesley Stahl
Will change soon, now throw that ball
Hey so what, so what
Let’s just play and eat
Hey so what, so what


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